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Sep
4
Finally after months of e-mails, phone calls, unwanted deliveries, over payments, snail mail letters, and the like, it’s over.
I mailed a letter (required by Poland Springs) to stop automatically withdrawing from my bank account. You have to send a letter to Kentucky for this. No other form of communication is acceptable for this. And it has to be dipped in spring water.
This gave me a little bit of an edge, but if you’ve read the other Poland Spring posts on this blog you know that it didn’t give me much of an edge.
Finally I got a letter. A letter notifying me that I was behind on my payments. From a water company that I’ve been trying to cancel deliveries from for six months. The letter warned me that if I didn’t pay they would stop delivering water to me. PERFECT! Except there were late charges.
We called. Actually my wife called and dealt with them. Pointed out that we have in fact paid for 12 months (16 actually) and have honored our side of the deal, that we currently have 50 gallons of water in our closet, basement, and garage, and that we are tired of their customer service and bull shit. Long story short. They terminated our contract. Now I can concentrate on bitching about something else. Mortgage companies, credit cards, cars, mechanics, telemarketers, pedestrians, other drivers, neighbors, in-laws, family, Obama, McCain, Palin (I like Biden a little), and anything else that pisses me off. At least the water debacle is over. Now I just have to drink 50 gallons of water and figure out how to deal with the bottles. Come to think of it. They’ll probably charge me for the bottles, or a pick up fee. Maybe it’s not over.
Aug
24
I think I mentioned previously that I tested our tap water against Poland Springs. The tests consists of eight areas of purity or contamination, as the case may be.
The results can be seen on the testing strips below. Which is which, Poland Springs or tap water is irrelevant. Which colors represent which particular chemical is also irrelevant. What is relevant is that the test results are identical.
So there you have it. I’m sure the battle isn’t over and our cat will continue to drink cooled spring water from some tap in Nestle’s basement, while the CEO rests his feet on a wad of Swiss Francs. Francs made from selling frigging water.
Aug
12
When we last left our hero, he had cancelled Poland Springs water through September. Today, according to their records, I’m getting a water delivery today. I guess their really cool on line ordering and modification interface doesn’t record when you cancel a delivery. What’s even more infuriating is that if you cancel more than three months, they’ll charge you any way. Maybe they figure they’re doing me a favor by bringing me water. The plants are parched? No it’s been friggin raining every day this month. The cat needs water? Nope, he drinks fresh spring water due to our abundant supply. Today we’ll be up to 45 gallons after today’s 15 gallon delivery.
To make matters make me want to punch myself in the face a little more, I bought a home water testing kit. Ten bucks at Home Depot and it tests for something like eight or nine areas of water awesomness. The results? Tune in next week when we look at the shocking video ……
Seriously …. Poland Springs and my tap water are identical. Identlically safe and tasty at least. Whether there’s a fly terd in mine I have no idea, but it is just as safe as their tap water.
Yes, I could cancel, but that’ll cost me $100, what I’m trying to understand is how a one year contract (and they tack on your cancelled to deliveries to the end of the contract) that I signed up for in 2007 is now, according to them, not ending until 2009.
Jul
31
And the Poland Springs water debacle continuous. Here’s a piece of an e-mail that I got back:
Further, our records indicate that we delivered
3 bottles at no charge on 07/16/08 for the
replacement delivery of June.If you have any further questions regarding the
Pure Savings Plan, please
call our Customer Service Center.
A Customer Service Representative is
available at 800-950-9396,
Monday - Friday, 8 am - 9 pm EST and
Saturday, 8 am - 4 pm EST.We appreciate you for choosing Poland Spring
as your water serviceprovider.Sincerely,
E-Service Support Representative
Poland Spring Water
www.polandspring.com/service
Fantastic! Except this makes no sense. There’s really no need for me to go into a rant here, as I did it in an e-mail back to them:
In response to the numerous confusing e-mails, phone calls and uninformative website,
You said in your last e-mail: “Further, our records indicate that we delivered 3 bottles at no charge on 07/16/08 for the replacement delivery of June.”
But you did charge me. You charged me! $28.93 in May, which you said you’d credit me.
As your e-mail from 06/06/08 states: “Thank you for using polandspring.com. We apologize for the inconvenience caused. Please note, a credit in the amount of $28.98 will be applied to your account.”I had canceled deliveries from May until September. The charge in May was your error when you charged me and didn’t deliver any water. Now you’re claiming that we somehow received “free” water, which isn’t the case. You simply delivered water that I paid for and didn’t want.
In addition, I’m seeing a current balance of $26.98 that I supposedly owe you. For what? Our next delivery should be in September.
My wife has also spent too much time on the phone with your “service” department and was informed that canceling a delivery doesn’t actually cancel the delivery, but in fact defers the delivery to a later time. A later time that you charge for before delivering the product. And if we defer (we’ll call it that) delivery for more than three months (because we have enough water to irrigate Arizona) you charge us regardless of whether you deliver water or not.
The oil surcharge is another matter that needs to be addressed on a different forum, but sufficed to say, that informing customers that they’ll be chipping in to help pay for gas to deliver water is a bit much. Your rate has now gone up to $3.00 per customer, per delivery, which if you plan your deliveries carefully could actually be profitable.
I’m sure this e-mail has been less than clear and may even be a bit confusing … welcome to my world.
Jul
31
Poland Springs Scam
Filed Under Corporate Shitheadery | 1 Comment
Aside from the fact that I’m a complete jackass for having bottled water delivered to my house and that the actual price of that water is more than what I would willingly pay for gas (approximately $2.00/gallon) I’m beginning to question the accounting practices of Poland Springs. Now owned by Nestle and was sued for fraud in 2003.
I have three 5-gallon jugs of water delivered every month. More than enough for two people and a cat. Yes, we have such an abundance of water that the cat drinks “spring water”. It’s on quotes because I question whether it is in fact spring water. You can check out this post for more on that.
May
12
It’s just water
Filed Under WTF? Shitheadery | 1 Comment
I have thirty gallons of bottled water at my house. I’ve had them for a few months and I keep getting more delivered. I don’t want them delivered, they just keep showing up and I keep getting charged. I’ve gone to the Poland Springs website and clicked on the “Skip a Delivery” button at the beginning of the month. A couple of days later my bank account is automatically charged and three bottles are on my back porch when I get home.
